It's (almost) official. We are moving. As most of you know, we built a house in the 'burbs a couple years ago. We quickly realized that we aren't really "suburb people" (I know, Dad- you called it). We decided to put our house on the market in March and have suffered through the last few months with an immaculate house, last minute showings and people showing up at our door unannounced. Well, it FINALLY paid off. Yesterday, we got an offer on the house and after lots of counter offers we accepted! Today, they gave us their earnest check so now we are just waiting on the inspection and we will be good to go. I am assuming the inspection will be a breeze since our house is only 2 years old.
Our buyers used a few unusual tactics when putting the offer on our house. Here's the story...
They showed up late (after the hour window to see the house) yesterday and so Quentin was home when they arrived. Quentin offered to leave the house, but they insisted he stay so he could answer some questions. Apparently, they had seen our house before and this was their second visit. Quentin spent the next 45 minutes showing them every last detail of our house. A few hours later, we received a call from our realtor saying that they were writing an offer and he would call when he had it. A short time later, Brian called with their first offer- $10,000 below asking price PLUS the following: $2500 closing costs, a home warranty, our 3 sets of patio furniture, our living room furniture, our family room furniture, our game table, washer and dryer, all kitchen and bar appliances, 2 mounted TV's and all of our stereo equipment. Um....what?!?! Are you serious? Do you want my clothes too? Obviously, we countered and again and again and again. We were out with our friends Scotty and Jacque and kept having to step outside to talk to Brian, our realtor. I think Brian said that we ended up having 10 counter offers. These people really loved our stuff! It was almost comical and I believe both realtors were forced to drink heavily last night due to these funny buyers. Finally, at about 11:30pm we came to an agreement. Whew, that was exhausting just rehashing it! Don't worry, we did not give up all our furniture and belongings. We actually ended with a pretty good deal and are going to walk away with a little cash, but do have to leave some patio furniture, TV's and stereo equipment. Apparently, these people don't realize there is this awesome place called Best Buy where you can buy TV's. I think Q is secretly excited to upgrade his TV anyway so it all worked out!
Of course, our buyers want to move in August 15th so we better kick it into gear to find a new place to live. Another side note, we had considered moving back into our condo for a year (our renters moved out a few weeks ago), but we actually rented it to a new couple last week...go figure! Oh well, we probably didn't want to live in a condo when we have a child anyway...and our dogs have gotten really used to having a yard.
We are a little sad to move away from our fav neighbors, Jake and Eva, but I'm sure we will still see them just as much when we are 20 minutes apart instead of 20 seconds!
Goodbye Suburbs...Hello City!
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Sunday, July 1, 2012
{Continuing To Wait}
As I may have mentioned before, I am not the most patient person in the world- and neither is my husband. Traffic, lines, slow walking people drive us crazy! So, this whole adoption process may be driving us a little crazy. We have gotten our hopes up several times the last few months only to have them knocked back down. We are now trying to be a little more proactive in our adoption search. For the last few months we have been using a local agency (who is absolutely wonderful by the way). The only problem is that they only do about 25 adoptions total a year- and the majority of them are cute little caucasian babies. The problem? In case you haven't noticed, we are a biracial couple and kinda want to adopt a biracial baby. So...we have decided to start working with another agency (and still keep working with our current one too). A little larger agency agency this time. Still located in Kansas City, but they do a ton of national adoptions. As in about 300 a year- and even better than this number, is that they do a TON of biracial babes in that total! Yay! You may ask, "why didn't you use this agency in the first place?" Well, good question. The main reason we chose to initially use a smaller agency is cost. Adoption is a little pricey no matter what route you choose, however some agencies charge up front fees and some don't. Our first agency did not charge until we were matched with a baby (bonus!). The new agency, on the other hand, charges some up front fees, but the majority is due at match.
It almost feels like we are starting over because this new agency has an entirely different process. I have just spent the last +/- 8 hours filling out paperwork and online profiles, copying paperwork and finding over 100 pictures for our new profile. Yikes!! I have a few pictures I need to take of our house and neighborhood tomorrow, but after that I should be done. Hooray! Well, for now anyway. Our new agency also requires us to do a video profile so in the next week or so a video camera and instructions will arrive at our doorstep so we can film ourselves. Be prepared friends and fam...you may be asked to make special video appearances! :)
On a side note is was SO nice to have my fam in town this weekend to take our minds off all we have to do in regards to adoption. Thank you for sidetracking us...even if just for a few days!
It almost feels like we are starting over because this new agency has an entirely different process. I have just spent the last +/- 8 hours filling out paperwork and online profiles, copying paperwork and finding over 100 pictures for our new profile. Yikes!! I have a few pictures I need to take of our house and neighborhood tomorrow, but after that I should be done. Hooray! Well, for now anyway. Our new agency also requires us to do a video profile so in the next week or so a video camera and instructions will arrive at our doorstep so we can film ourselves. Be prepared friends and fam...you may be asked to make special video appearances! :)
On a side note is was SO nice to have my fam in town this weekend to take our minds off all we have to do in regards to adoption. Thank you for sidetracking us...even if just for a few days!
Monday, June 18, 2012
Paper Pregnant
I recently saw this online and had to steal it...love it!
Paper Pregnant: How Adoption and Pregnancy Are Similar
Pregnancy has wait times most every woman goes through. The two week wait, the shower countdown, and of course the highly anticipated due date. Among others like the ultrasounds or the first heartbeat.
Adoption has it’s own wait times. The completion of the homestudy, the referral of a child or children, and then the travel date. After that, it’s a finalized adoption later on when the post homestudy is completed.
This process is incredibly different from and yet so much the same with being pregnant with Bella and then my twins. I’ve been told we are “paper pregnant” which fits well (and I think is a cute term). Although, part of me thinks we won’t even be that until we have a referral.
Pregnancy is an instant “Yes! ___ months to go!” Adoption is more of reliving that moment several times over as the process gets closer to an actual time frame you can talk about. Usually the two week wait comes at the very end when you wait for your travel call and get 10-14 days to pack up and head overseas.
This is a very emotional journey of it’s own. We notice a complete difference in reactions when telling people we are adopting – it’s not that they aren’t excited, but there isn’t a actual child (yet) to be excited over. They are more curious and often taken aback (We hear a lot, “So you’ll never have kids again?” and we assure them that isn’t the only reason for adoption), and always eager to know more about it.
The referral of a child to us will be a huge moment – probably the biggest one of this until we go to get them. We will have things to tell people about them, a picture to show, skills and personalities to brag on; as all parents do. We will be able to find out what special needs our child has and research how to best care for them, how it will impact them and us in the future, and connect with others who may know about it. We will be able to get to know our child and see them grow up before we even can hold them and call them ours.
It’s such a different thing to go through in becoming a parent, yet each step reminds me so much of parts my past two pregnancies. So many emotional highs and lows (“We can’t wait!” and “Are we doing the right thing?” and “Can we do this?!”) hit us each and every day. We know in our hearts we were meant for this, that our family isn’t complete yet and our boys didn’t leave us here with the inability to move forward – their memories are always on our minds.
No matter how long this “paper pregnancy” takes, just like when you carry a child in you, it’s always worth it in the end.
Paper Pregnant: How Adoption and Pregnancy Are Similar
Pregnancy has wait times most every woman goes through. The two week wait, the shower countdown, and of course the highly anticipated due date. Among others like the ultrasounds or the first heartbeat.Adoption has it’s own wait times. The completion of the homestudy, the referral of a child or children, and then the travel date. After that, it’s a finalized adoption later on when the post homestudy is completed.
This process is incredibly different from and yet so much the same with being pregnant with Bella and then my twins. I’ve been told we are “paper pregnant” which fits well (and I think is a cute term). Although, part of me thinks we won’t even be that until we have a referral.
Pregnancy is an instant “Yes! ___ months to go!” Adoption is more of reliving that moment several times over as the process gets closer to an actual time frame you can talk about. Usually the two week wait comes at the very end when you wait for your travel call and get 10-14 days to pack up and head overseas.
This is a very emotional journey of it’s own. We notice a complete difference in reactions when telling people we are adopting – it’s not that they aren’t excited, but there isn’t a actual child (yet) to be excited over. They are more curious and often taken aback (We hear a lot, “So you’ll never have kids again?” and we assure them that isn’t the only reason for adoption), and always eager to know more about it.
The referral of a child to us will be a huge moment – probably the biggest one of this until we go to get them. We will have things to tell people about them, a picture to show, skills and personalities to brag on; as all parents do. We will be able to find out what special needs our child has and research how to best care for them, how it will impact them and us in the future, and connect with others who may know about it. We will be able to get to know our child and see them grow up before we even can hold them and call them ours.
It’s such a different thing to go through in becoming a parent, yet each step reminds me so much of parts my past two pregnancies. So many emotional highs and lows (“We can’t wait!” and “Are we doing the right thing?” and “Can we do this?!”) hit us each and every day. We know in our hearts we were meant for this, that our family isn’t complete yet and our boys didn’t leave us here with the inability to move forward – their memories are always on our minds.
No matter how long this “paper pregnancy” takes, just like when you carry a child in you, it’s always worth it in the end.
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Happy Father's Day!
Happy Father's Day to the best Dad in the whole world! I am so blessed to have such a supportive and loving father in my life- I can't imagine my life without him!
And to my hubby, you are an awesome Dad to our four-legged children and I can't wait to see what an awesome Dad you will be very soon!
Love you guys!!
And to my hubby, you are an awesome Dad to our four-legged children and I can't wait to see what an awesome Dad you will be very soon!
Love you guys!!
I Am A Slacker...
I have had many comments about my blogging (or lack therof) lately. Apparently, my friends think that I need to update a little lot more often. I will do my best to (try) to update weekly.
After going through months of emotional ups and downs with infertility treatments, I think that I thought switching gears to adoption would be a relief- man, was I wrong! Adoption is a constant waiting game and emotional roller coaster.
For those of you that don't know, in the private adoption world we must be chosen by a birthmother. We have had a couple opportunities for our profile to be submitted to a birthmother. I haven't decided if I like knowing when we are presented or not- it may be better to not know, then I don't have to stress out about it.
In the first case, the birthmother loved us (yay!!); however after we were able to reveiw her medical records and background and talking with our social worker it was a situation that we were just not comfortable with so unfortunately we had to decline. I was perfectly fine with this decision at the time, but as the days pass by I keep hearing a little voice in the back of my head saying "maybe we should have jumped on that situation- what were we thinking?!?" I know, I know, the right situation will come along, but you can't help but wonder, right?
The second time, I found a situation posted online by a referral service. **Another side of adoption I have learned about in private adoption- there are agencies, adoption attorneys, referral services and facilitators. All are very, very different. Some are expensive, some are not; some are ethical, some are not; some require large down payments, some do not...what I have discovered is that domestic adoption is not nearly as regulated as I once believed it to be** The referral service I happened to find this situation on is a pretty good one and the situation was perfect! Awesome birthparents, medical history, etc and our social worker told us to go for it! Of course, Q was out of town at the time and I was working 3 12 hour shifts in a row and all paperwork had to be submitted within 2 days. So, I got to spend my evenings filling out applications, reformatting our online photo album, and going to FedEx at 5am to send our packet to the agency. I was SO excited- I just knew this one was going to be perfect! I. Was. Wrong. Apparently, the agency shows their clients that have already paid fees first, we on the other hand were "outreach clients" since we are registered with another agency and only paid a small application fee to apply for this situation. Long story short, they showed their clients first and the birthmother chose from that group so our profile was not even shown after all that work. So frustrating...
So, the roller coaster continues. Please keep us in your prayers!
After going through months of emotional ups and downs with infertility treatments, I think that I thought switching gears to adoption would be a relief- man, was I wrong! Adoption is a constant waiting game and emotional roller coaster.
For those of you that don't know, in the private adoption world we must be chosen by a birthmother. We have had a couple opportunities for our profile to be submitted to a birthmother. I haven't decided if I like knowing when we are presented or not- it may be better to not know, then I don't have to stress out about it.
In the first case, the birthmother loved us (yay!!); however after we were able to reveiw her medical records and background and talking with our social worker it was a situation that we were just not comfortable with so unfortunately we had to decline. I was perfectly fine with this decision at the time, but as the days pass by I keep hearing a little voice in the back of my head saying "maybe we should have jumped on that situation- what were we thinking?!?" I know, I know, the right situation will come along, but you can't help but wonder, right?
The second time, I found a situation posted online by a referral service. **Another side of adoption I have learned about in private adoption- there are agencies, adoption attorneys, referral services and facilitators. All are very, very different. Some are expensive, some are not; some are ethical, some are not; some require large down payments, some do not...what I have discovered is that domestic adoption is not nearly as regulated as I once believed it to be** The referral service I happened to find this situation on is a pretty good one and the situation was perfect! Awesome birthparents, medical history, etc and our social worker told us to go for it! Of course, Q was out of town at the time and I was working 3 12 hour shifts in a row and all paperwork had to be submitted within 2 days. So, I got to spend my evenings filling out applications, reformatting our online photo album, and going to FedEx at 5am to send our packet to the agency. I was SO excited- I just knew this one was going to be perfect! I. Was. Wrong. Apparently, the agency shows their clients that have already paid fees first, we on the other hand were "outreach clients" since we are registered with another agency and only paid a small application fee to apply for this situation. Long story short, they showed their clients first and the birthmother chose from that group so our profile was not even shown after all that work. So frustrating...
So, the roller coaster continues. Please keep us in your prayers!
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Networking...does it really work?
Quentin recently started his own law firm with a friend. Obviously, with a new business networking is a big deal. Quentin who previously has been opposed to social networking (no Facebook page for him!) has now become a big fan of LinkedIn. He spends many a night looking through this website and connecting with people he thinks might be a good contact. Believe it or not...it has worked! Business people have been willing to meet him for coffee and he has made several good contacts! Who knew?!? Maybe social networking isn't so bad after all!
Side note, Q STILL doesn't have a Facebook page, he has given in and at least the firm now has a page! Baby steps...
Now, to the real point of this post. I have heard from many different people that the best way to find a potential child to adopt is through networking. Quentin and I have been hesitant to share every aspect of our personal lives with people, but we are slowly getting better at it (ie blog). We have met and heard about several couples who have adopted through a friend of a friend, word of mouth, posting cards on bulletin boards, advertising online, etc. So, I guess we will give it a try.
Our adoption profile is now on our agency website:
http://www.adoptionoptionkc.com/AdoptiveFamilies/Pages/Quentin_Melissa.html
Today, I have also joined several websites that allow agencies to search through potential adoptive parent profiles. I have also emailed several adoption attorneys in several states who will hold our profile at no charge.
I know we have a lot of friends with creative minds so I am asking you to give me any suggestions you can think of- no matter how crazy or unlikely they may seem. You never know who or what will put you in contact with a potential birthmother! I can't wait to hear your ideas!
Side note, Q STILL doesn't have a Facebook page, he has given in and at least the firm now has a page! Baby steps...
Now, to the real point of this post. I have heard from many different people that the best way to find a potential child to adopt is through networking. Quentin and I have been hesitant to share every aspect of our personal lives with people, but we are slowly getting better at it (ie blog). We have met and heard about several couples who have adopted through a friend of a friend, word of mouth, posting cards on bulletin boards, advertising online, etc. So, I guess we will give it a try.
Our adoption profile is now on our agency website:
http://www.adoptionoptionkc.com/AdoptiveFamilies/Pages/Quentin_Melissa.html
Today, I have also joined several websites that allow agencies to search through potential adoptive parent profiles. I have also emailed several adoption attorneys in several states who will hold our profile at no charge.
I know we have a lot of friends with creative minds so I am asking you to give me any suggestions you can think of- no matter how crazy or unlikely they may seem. You never know who or what will put you in contact with a potential birthmother! I can't wait to hear your ideas!
HURRY UP...and wait.
Since beginning our adoption journey everything has been rush, rush, rush...until our home study was approved last month. Since then, our rushing has turned into waiting. I am definitely not the most patient person in the world and I am definitely much more impatient while waiting for a baby. I find myself constantly checking my phone and email to see if our agency or attorney have tried to get in contact with us, constantly looking at other agencies websites to see if they happen to be looking for adoptive parents for a specific situation and borderline stalking adoption websites and forums.
I have made some new friends in adoption forums who are in the same situation as us and who are also experiencing the waiting. It's nice to know others are having a similar experience and we are not alone while we wait.
Please keep us in your prayers that our waiting will be short lived and we will be matched with a birthmother soon!
I have made some new friends in adoption forums who are in the same situation as us and who are also experiencing the waiting. It's nice to know others are having a similar experience and we are not alone while we wait.
Please keep us in your prayers that our waiting will be short lived and we will be matched with a birthmother soon!
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