Monday, April 30, 2012

What I Learned This Week:

I feel like I am an educated member of society, but what I have learned this week blew me away. Q and I attended an adoption forum at a church near our house the other night. I went in thinking I would hear about adoption options in the community, financing our adoption and meet some good contacts. What I did not expect, was to be completely blown away.

I know that this world is full of children in need- children that need homes, food, shelter and care, but I was absolutely shocked at the statistics of children right here in the United States. Sorry, this may be a little boring...but check out these numbers- it is absolutely insane!

In December 2010...

There were over 10,000 children in state custody

About 3,400 of these children were living with a relative

That leaves 6,700 children in state custody who need foster care....and only 2,800 foster care families

That means that if EVERY foster family has a child that there are still almost 4,000 children that need a place to stay...which means they will be sleeping in a group home.

A child usually stays in state custody for over 24 months


I don't know about you, but this makes me sad...very sad.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

The Road To Adoption...

We. Are. Adopting. After months and months of crazy shots and hormones, we have decided to no longer pursue fertility treatments and instead turn to adoption to expand our family. Quentin and I are both excited to have children and we came to the realization that we want to be parents- it doesn't matter how we become parents- it matters that we do become parents.

Adoption, like infertility treatments, is much more than I ever imagined. Last month we met with a social worker at an adoption agency. We spent a day and a half with her discussing every aspect of our lives, education, family, friends, medical name it- we probably talked about it.

**Warning, small rant ahead**

In my logical mind, I understand this, but in my crazy, un-rational mind, I do not. Why do we, (somewhat) normal, stable, educated people have to fill out mountains of paperwork, state and federal background checks, FBI clearance, financial reports, letters of recomendation, social worker interviews, and on and on when anyone can have a child?!? Sometimes things just aren't fair...

After our interview and mounds and mounds of paperwork, we are now officially home-study approved! Yay!!! What does this mean, you ask? It means we will be suitable parents for a biracial newborn. :)

So, now the wait begins. We are praying for the perfect match and hopefully our baby will be here soon! Please keep us in your prayers as there are still many obstacles to overcome in this journey!

P.S. Thank you to a few of our WONDERFUL friends who wrote such awesome letters of recommendation for us. You are the best!!

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Infertility {sucks}

Every little girl grows up imagining what her life will be like one day. It usually goes something like, job, marriage, baby. But what happens when God throws you a curve ball? What happens then? Enter my world:

At age 17, most girls are thinking about everything except having children- thats exactly what I was doing. That is, until I was diagnosed with something that would forever change me. I was told that I would not ever be able to have biological children. At age 17, I don't think I fully comprehended what this would mean later in life. Of course, I was upset, but it wasn't something that would alter my current life.

Fast forward to 2011 and age 30. This diagnosis now alters my current life. This is the year that Quentin and I decided it was time to have children. We knew it was going to be difficult, but I don't think we had any idea what we were in for.

We began meeting with a reproductive doctor (the same one who had been my doctor since age 17). We had a plan. We were going to find someone to donate eggs to us and do IVF with those eggs. Sounds easy enough, right? IVF sounds like a piece of cake until you realize just how many medications and shots you will be giving yourself each day to prepare your body to have a baby. I have never had so many bruises, knots and pain in my body as I did during that time. We found a donor fairly easily and were ready to go.

Our first IVF round was in May of 2011. They transferred 2 embryos into my body and then the 10 day wait began to see if we were pregnant. Longest. Wait. Ever. After the wait, a pregnancy test was taken. It was a positive test, but the hcg levels weren't very high so I had to continue having blood tests done every few days for the next few weeks to make sure it was increasing. It was increasing, but not fast enough which was a bad sign. Finally the day arrived that we could have an ultrasound, but unfortunately there was no heartbeat. We then found out that our babies had implanted in my fallopian tubes and I would miscarry within a few days. Our doctors appointment was on a Friday and I had misscarried by Sunday. We were heartbroken, but kept trusting that God had a plan for us and we still had 2 frozen embryos left to use.

Our second IVF cycle was in November. We transferred our 2 frozen embryos, but this time neither of them implanted. We were now out of embryos. We had a decision to make about what to do next.

We decided that we needed to try IVF one more time with fresh eggs to give it another chance. In January we began another treatment cycle and 2 new embryos were implanted. Sadly, my pregnancy test was again negative.

After 3 tries, we knew we could not continue on this emotional roller coaster. We needed to come up with a plan which has lead us to where we are today...

The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter.


I. Have. A. Blog. Yikes! Every feel like you are being pushed to do something and have absolutely no idea why? That is where I am at right idea why I am starting a blog, but I feel like it's something that I need to do. So, here it goes...